Thanks to Nathan Mensink for sharing this, and Mr. Charles Long for posting it to Facebook.
No Child Left Behind: The Football Version
1. All teams must make the state playoffs and all MUST win the
championship. If a team does not win the championship, they will be on
probation until they are the champions, and coaches will be held
accountable. If after two years they have not won the championship their
footballs and equipment will be taken away UNTIL they do win the
championship.
2. All kids will be expected to have the same
football skills at the same time, even if they do not have the same
conditions or opportunities to practice on their own. NO exceptions will
be made for lack of interest in football, a desire to perform
athletically, or genetic abilities or disabilities of themselves or
their parents. ALL KIDS WILL PLAY FOOTBALL AT A PROFICIENT LEVEL!
3. Talented players will be asked to workout on their own, without
instruction. This is because the coaches will be using all their
instructional time with the athletes who aren't interested in football,
have limited athletic ability or whose parents don't like football.
4. Games will be played year round, but statistics will only be kept in
the 4th, 8th, and 11th game. This will create a New Age of Sports where
every school is expected to have the same level of talent and all team
will reach the same minimum goals. If no child gets ahead, then no child
is left behind. If parents do not like this new law, they are
encouraged to vote for vouchers and support private schools that can
screen out the non - athletes and prevent their children from having to
go to school with bad football players.
I think that education reform is a good idea, but I don't think that programs like NCLB or even Race to the Top are the way to do it.
No comments:
Post a Comment